Scars on the Heart
She
was exotic, her and her brother’s to the students of Cappa High in Mountain
View, Washington. All eyes landed on
them as they made their way through the lunch room. The two boys-Casper and Jasper- walking on
either side of Geneviere. To the other
students they’re the new kids. The rare
batch of triplets who were unbelievably close.
In reality though, there were first
cousins born on the same day, same month, same year in the same hospital. But to each other they felt like fibers of
the same thread. So as usual, the two
boys claimed their lovely cousin as sister and she in return claimed them as
brothers.
To the twin boys it was new. Though they had traveled the world helping
people, they had always been enrolled at the same schools in their
hometown. They were here for only one
reason though- to make sure Geneviere adjusted to her new surroundings.
Geneviere was a shy but worldly five
feet and five and a half inches tall.
She had steel blue eyes that always appeared to be shouldering something
but you could never tell what. Her hair
was kept at shoulder length and it always lied on the balance between dishwater
blonde and light brown with slight red highlights.
To Geneviere this was just another
school, another town, another place in time that will blend in with so many
others. From a young age she started
traveling the world due to a heartbreaking event. Her parents divorced when she was six and in
the settlement her mother, Sarah McClain, got full custody over her more
responsible and less erratic father, Thomas Johnson.
Geneviere had carried around a
feeling of unwantedness when regard of her father’s feelings towards her. Even since Jackson’s death a lot has changed
in her immediate family. her mother set
off immediately the divorce to California where she buried her grief in work
and men.
Thomas left the family ranch in
Gatesville, Texas and moved up north to the large property he owned in Mountain
View, Washington. Thomas was still a figure
at the family’s global business, but he did not participate actively. Unlike his ex-wife, he drew into himself and
refrained from making any important decisions.
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This is what I have so far, it's not much but it's got potential.
A good start!
ReplyDeleteI'm loving it. I live in Washington. Triplets but not really, clever... I'm thrilled you have a new kitty. Gayle
ReplyDelete"Unlike his ex-wife, he drew into himself and refrained from making any important decisions."
ReplyDeleteExcellent. Smooth, descriptive, opens the door to more character development.
Keep going, don't stop. Get the foundations down now, edit later.
impressive!! i know kids in college and beyond that arent as imaginative or as talented of a writer. keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThat is a good start. Keep it up.
ReplyDeleteWhat great potential! All good stories start out as rough skeletons. It's up to you to flesh them out into living, breathing things. I have high hopes. Someday, when you're uber-famous, I'm gonna be able to say "I knew Longstory when..."
ReplyDeleteWonderful wordplay...
ReplyDeleteReally good start to a story. Keep up the good work. I am so glad Coco came back to you, and the kitten is cute.
ReplyDeleteT
I really like the characters, and how you introduced them. It really makes me want to get to know more and them and their families (they seem so mysterious now).
ReplyDeleteNice start..a tantalizing whiff of mystery. More, please
ReplyDelete